“It never hurts to remind the folks just exactly who you are.” – pg. 9
“In the future, everyone will be anonymous for fifteen minutes.” – pg. 78
“That’s the way comedy works. They either hate you or they don’t completely hate you.” – pg. 87
“I remember a psychiatrist once telling me that I gamble in order to escape the reality of life, and I told him that’s why everyone does everything.”– pg. 112
“The house edge becomes more certain the more hands you play. The less you play, the less you’re against it. Simple as that.” – pg. 205
“It doesn’t matter how cynical I think I am. I’m always delighted to find out that things in this life still have the capacity to surprise me.” – pg. 228
“Nobody ever said your life had to make a damn bit of sense. Just as long as it had enough words – that’s all.” – pg. 236
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